Fight with class not crass

Relationships are not always fun, exciting or romantic....like in the movies.

Many times, it involves a lot of hard work, dedication, and patience. During a quarrel, both parties are just trying to be understood, but get distracted with mindless gestures, sarcastic undertone and snarly remarks. Let's be honest, behind closed doors we don't handle problems like the Tanners in Full House, and never hear soft sappy music once a solution surfaces. No generally, arguments are fuel with an intense passion due to the strong feelings and bond that are shared by the couple. 

So if this ever-oh-so strong bond is shared, why is it so difficult to fix some issues.  

Here are some simple tips that may help smooth things out between you and your partner when the next battle occurs.

• Clear the mechanism.
 Like a pitcher in a baseball game, all distractions must come to a stop and cleared/ignored to be able to throw a good pitch. Problems cannot be truly solved if handled at a loud and distracting environment. So arguing at a party, not a good idea. Trying to be heard while your partner's favorite television show is airing...again..not a good idea. Find a comfortable place for both parties to discuss, distraction and stress free.

• Before battle, wash your mouth out with soap.
When an argument arises, crude language, name calling and shouting brings nothing but heartaches, headaches and dead ends to solutions. Hurtful words can never be erased. It is not healthy to think or feel comfortable to humiliate your partner when they are vulnerable. Calling your loved one a female dog or the synonym for a donkey, not normal. Have some respect, talk to individuals the way you would want them to talk to you.

• You're not yellow, if you walk away.
At times, arguments get quite heated that instead of blowing up and doing something that one might regret, walking away and cooling off is the best decision. There are people that prefer dealing with the issue immediately and others need to walk away, collect their thoughts so that they can express themselves correctly. Many times relationships are made up of these two types...which is fine, if both can come to a compromise. Don't get upset if your partner needs to step out of the situation. Remember to be patience, and know that they are not running away from the situation, but more to trying to find the solution. As for the walker, please be considerate of the time you take to calm down. Disappearing for hours is not really considerate when concerning your partner and their feelings.

• True hearts can bleed.
Saying what you truly feel isn't easy. The honest truth can hurt, and so when asked to say the honest truth..take your time. Honesty is a funny thing. Being honest with yourself, is at times a great battle, let alone with a partner it can sometimes feeling like the most difficult obstacle to face. Relationships need honesty, but both partners must understand it might not be exactly what they wanted to hear or face. You have been warned, prepare yourself.

• They've seen your birthday suit, so don't be shy to bare it all. 
 Exposing yourself, being vulnerable, not knowing if you will be handled with care or torn to pieces.... is hard to do. No one knows in love, but once you take the chance, you will truly know. How? Well maybe it's the romantic in me, but a truly good partner, will not shut you down but embrace the moment. And honestly, if your partner is exposing themselves, why do a douchey thing like knocking the wind out of them with crass and immature mockery. Exposure in a relationship should be a wondrous, discovering experience. So whenever it may occur, under the sheets, face to face during pillow talk or during a heated dispute, remember it's a learning experience not a competition.

Hope these tips will smooth future disputes between you and your partner...and if ever you have any questions on how to deal with an issue, don't be shy...give me a shout :)